Monday, May 17, 2004

What an emotional weekend! Saturday was spent in play - took my darling stepson to go with Lissa and Jen to watch a new alpaca farm do their first shearings. Beautiful, sweet animals, and getting the fleece still warm from the animal I've just met is a treat - some may wear Harry Winston or Vera Wang. I will wear Apache and Carousel! It just reinforced my desire to do that instead of deal with office politics, and was just a heavenly morning spent with dear friends. I will think of those giant sweet eyes, and those cute purrs and whispers, each time I play with the fiber or wear the final products! SS was a trooper too - interested in the animals, playing quite well with Jen's little ones, and the sweet boy he always is. One of my favorite moments was when Dylan brought his knitting out at lunch. We were at the table, and in another bunch I might have told him it shouldn't be a mealtime activity, but not this group! Jen was knitting a hat, and SS had taken what started as a scarf, gotten tangled at home, and couldn't remember how to cast on. So he started over, knitting one stitch onto the needle, knitting into that, and into that, and into that, so that he had about thirty one-stitch rows. A rope. Jen's little man said "what are you knitting?" but SS didn't hear the "what" part, and responded "yeah" with that "what are you going to make of it" tone that boys seem to be born with. Jen's son, raised by a knitting momma and a good-man poppa, sighed and said "I said 'what are you knitting?'" making it very clear that the knitting wasn't an issue, he was just curious. Very good for him to see another young boy who didn't think knitting was sissy!

The whole process of making a sweater by hand is so simple - relatively unchanged for centuries. Electric shearers now, sometimes, and needles of varied materials, but there's something so peacefull and ancient in the process. I feel honored to have been there for the very start.

After lunch we stopped off at a yarn shop near Jen, and he met the owner, Rowena, who was so very helpful and kind and encouraging. He got some lovely yarn to make gloves - a far too advanced project for him just now, but I don't dare discourage him. We'll find a way to make it work.

Then Sunday was spent at a pet fair with Oscar. We drove an hour and sat and had people come buy. Oscar sure knows how to sell himself, and he got tons of compliments. It was SO hard!!! I don't want him to leave me, and yet I want for him to find the perfect home. I don't care for the system they have with pet fairs - if someone wants him, they can take him home right then. I want background checks galore - I did them without a single gripe when I adopted Aslan - and especially for a misunderstood breed like a pit, I want to know they've got the space for him, and a vet lined up. It feels like they did more research to see that I was okay to foster him, than they do to make sure he's got a good permanent home! There was one couple that I would have (begrudgingly) felt alright with taking him - they had large dogs, understood his puppy behavior, played well with him, and then took the time to calm him back down before handing him back... they loved him, but live in Michigan and were here visiting, so couldn't take him. That's fine, I really wasn't ready to say goodbye, anyway. GB said he knew how hard it was for me to go through with it (and didn't say "oh, lets just keep him" what's wrong with that man!?!?!?!) and was very patient with my cranky mood before we left in the morning, and even after we came home. The best part of the day was easily when I went inside to get a quick drink. Oscar had been flirting and kissing everyone and everything (even Belle, the tiny girl who wants to be an only dog at the house that adopts her. Oscar went to play with her and came away with a bloody nose when she bit him. He was startled, and barked back in shock, but wasn't hard to pull away, and kept a friendly distance for the rest of the day). Each person he cuddled with obviously felt he loved them only - not an easy thing for me to watch! But someone held him while I went in for a drink (Oscar would have shared, but I wasn't interested in his water bowl outside) When I came back out, the woman holding him was nearly pulled off her feet, and he started yipping and jumping, leaving the person he'd been kissing before, obviously so happy to see me again. It was nice to see that I am someone special to him, and not just another face to kiss. And so sweet to see him, completely pooped. Like those hyper active children who's parents watch them when they sleep and say "what a little angel" - this is how life is with Oscar! He's so full of energy, and keeps going and going full force, no matter what you ask of him. But then he was fast asleep in the car on the way home, and conked out on the living room floor the second we got inside, so devoid of energy the cats didn't even care that he was there.

I feel much the same. I do believe this afternoon will be a nap day!

Thoughts for the Day:

The Dalai Lama - “One of the expressions of Western over-reliance on technology can be seen in the lack of patience in industrial society. When you deal with technology, everything happens at the touch of a button. This conditions you to become so impatient that when you have an emotional or personal crisis, you don't allow time for the solution to take effect. This leads to all sorts of rash responses, like quarrels, fights and so on.”

Rebecca Hall - “We cannot talk with [animals] as we can with human beings, yet we can communicate with them on mental and emotional levels. They should, however, be accorded equality in that they should receive both compassion and respect; it is unworthy of us to exploit them in any way.”


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