Monday, February 19, 2007

Q & A

I think I used up all my entertaining points at my knitting night tonight (hi, girls!) so instead of being even a little creative, I'll simply respond to questions/comments left or e-mailed over the last few days.

1. No, I don't think anyone broke in. For one thing, I can't think of a drug that would make my hovel look appealing (but if there is one, please let me know, and I'll take it), for another it doesn't appear anything was taken (no smart comments, mother) and for another, the door wasn't left open that far, only about the width a cat would need to go for a stroll, not the amount a burglar would need to... burgle.

What I think happened is that as I was leaving for work, I was concentrating more on not breaking my neck on the ice than I was on closing the door as tight as humanly possible. When it's anything less than as tight as humanly possible, Trevor can open it (I think he carries files). So I think he did open it, probably went outside about two feet, and found the hard coldness on the ground, and came back in, upset. Aslan, who has been on a hunger strike for the past few days since I'm trying a new food for them, decided to try to hitchhike for the grocery store to buy mouse pate, but when he got out realized he didn't have thumbs (thus impeding the hitchhiking process) and didn't get too far.

2. No, Aslan is not hurt in anyway. He does have a small scratch by one of his ears, and I really think he may have gotten into a fight with the cat next door that irritates him by rudely walking in sight of Aslan's windows, but otherwise he's been strutting around with his chest puffed out like he's a bad ass now. I haven't found any new tattoos or piercings, but I did see a gesture that may have been a gang sign, I'm not sure. As I said, he's on a hunger strike, but since I have both the car keys and thumbs, I'm pretty sure I'm going to win, so otherwise things are fine.

3. Yes, Aslan is declawed, front feet only. This is a horrible, abhorant practice. But Aslan was not factory direct (we found each other when he was about five) and as Sarah said tonight, sometimes when you buy a used model, you have to accept whatever they've got in stock - no special orders can be made. New attitude aside, he's pretty much flawless in every other way, by far the most well-mannered cat I've ever known, and has me completely won over to the wonder that is a Norwegian Forest Cat.

4. The alcohol status in my house is as follows: beer (blech), wine (good, but not strong enough for a "where the hell is my cat" moment), schnapps, scotch.

I think this was actually a scotch moment, but since I wasn't sure how much medication was still in my system, I thought the scotch might kill me, and then who would try to give Aslan a guilt trip when he was back in the house, I ask you that? So schnapps it was.

5. Yes, Oscar apparently missed all the excitement. This is another thing that refutes a break-in theory. Oscar's bedroom has a hook-and-eye lock on it (to keep the cat out) and I think if someone were to break in, it would be no trouble at all for a pissed and defensive pitbull to break through. If there was any doubt in his mind that someone was hurting his brother-cats, he'd be out in a heartbeat, I'm sure. When the two of them fight, he goes over and gets between them. If someone else was hurting them or doing anything else he deemed threatening, I'd be Boberta the Builder replacing another door the next day.

don't mess with the fluffy badness


Blogger Kadiddly said...

Yeah, the TeddieCat came front declawed, too. I hate that, but it wasn't my choice and it wasn't his choice and there's nothing either of us can do about it now. He's pretty sure he's still the toughest thing on the block, though.

10:36 PM  
Blogger vi said...

here I thought it was only thaddeaus that we had to check for piercings and tats
I swear he needs a little leather hat and motorcyle jacket ala brando....

oh man.......
amie I will tell bernie no one broke in.....

and need a self closing storm door as a second line of defence

2:30 PM  
Blogger Catherine said...

It would be hard to find a tattoo on that cat. Check your credit card statements, he may have charged it.

I'm sure nobody broke in, because there is no door that would have kept Oscar behind it. And nobody would walk in the door you accidentally left open, because they know there is a pit bull in there. The best kind of pit bull - the kind who gets beat up by cats and loves his stuffed toys, but looks fierce and manly to protect the homestead.

7:13 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Meeeee Yeow!
Hubba Hubba

Emma & Gracie in PA

8:54 PM  
Anonymous sallyjo said...

I love it when critters get all full of themselves like that. My real dog treed a bear (okay, it was a yearling, and I ran in terror that mommy was around), and he completely changed. He was all, "Now I am a man", or whatever dogs think. Too bad it didn't work on that one german sheherd who whupped his butt.

12:08 PM  
Blogger dragon knitter said...

my cat jimmi is the same way as trevor. in fact, most of the doors in the house don't latch (don't ask, it's an old wwII house), so he goes where he will. the basement door, our bedroom door, and the doors to the outside latch, but that's it (no, the bathroom door does not latch, we just are a polite family, lol). so jimmi has the run of the house. in fact, we have to be careful about the screen door, because it doesn't always latch. oy.

10:52 PM  

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