Caution
I just got an e-mail that included, among expressions of dissatisfaction, this picture:
Apparently following the pattern isn't what was required here. She would like me to "advise, please." I would like to tell her to stuff the stockings where the sun don't shine, but I think that might not be in the true spirit of Christmas.
In the meantime, there's so much fuming going on in my head, I'm getting worried.
Seriously, what do I do? Homicide is likely not an option, since we know them through my husband's work, which is law enforcement, so not so great on the escape plan....
posted by Amie at
10:37 AM
14 Comments:
Step away from the ice cream and cookies NOW!
Maybe you could politely ask for all the stockings to be sent to you, and then wash the offending one several times in really hot water?
Or fill it with Oscar's favorite treats?
Or fill it with Oscar's....?
No good deed goes unpunished.
Oh, I know! Blame it on the Synthrol, and then weep uncontrollably.
I suppose it's too late to teach the person (read "ungrateful wretch") to knit?
sallyjo
State quietly and firmly that the pattern was written like that and that if the previous stocking was knit differently it isn't your fault.
and truly it isn't your problem as long as the last one isn't the size of a baby booty.
I do like the idea of teaching the asshat to knit....
Now is not the time to be married to someone in law enforcement because all my suggestions would get you in a WHOLE lot of trouble.
Perhaps you could find someone else a bit more appreciative with kids named Matt, Emma, Kiley and Patrick to give them to instead?
Did she ever make the finished dimensions available to you? If she had very specific wishes for something, I do wish she would have made them known rather than relying on your ability to read her mind. No copy of an original, made years later, is going to be exactly the same in any case.
And I dislike the phrase "please advise" immensely when used in this context. Advise her how? Advise her to hang them all up and be happy they are unique and well-crafted works? Somehow i don't think she's asking you to advise her on anything and so she really should use a different phrase.
Ditto to what Purlewe said!
"Please advise" - as a former work colleague would say, "Advise this" ^..^
XOXO
Actually, I think the ones that you did look in an older style than the large one. Just me I guess. I like the smallerish ones better. I'd just say "I'm sorry, I followed the pattern and was unaware of the other stockings sizes" or some other similarly bland response... in the mean time I'd really just not care :)
Shea
The answer to "Please advise."
"I followed the pattern, I don't know what happened to the first one but obviously the size is wrong."
You followed the pattern and got four virtually identical stockings, she has one made for Bigfoot, and this is somehow YOUR error? I think not.
So she expected you to do it a certain size without giving you the size to do it? Grrr
Offer to make Andi's sock so they all match (for a fee) otherwise tell her to pound sand.
Oops! my bitch is showing. I guess that's why I don't knit things like that for people.
Just let me say O-M-G! I can't believe she would have the audacity to say ANYthing other than Thank You. People never cease to amaze me *dripping sarcasm*.
I would simply follow the excellent advice of those who have gone before me -- I followed the pattern. I certainly wouldn't say sorry - you didn't do anything wrong.
Good luck!
What they said.
"Please advise," my arse.
I'm so sorry all of your hard work was only met with a slap in the face!! It's such a shame that she is so ungrateful. I would not offer to knit her another andi. I don't think you'll be able to please her no matter what you do. Cut your loses and move on to something for you, that way you know there is nothing but pleasure to come from it.
Hugs, Beth
Yes, what Beth said...a comfy, warm sweater or shawl for YOU. That will definitely make you feel better.
No way would I volunteer to knit this difficult woman another THING. I'd say, "I advise you to find another knitter who is a glutten for punishment to re-knit your original stocking, but I also advise you to give her the dimensions of the other stockings which I just made for you in the at-gauge size so that she has a clearer idea of your expectations. I doubt any of this will ultimately satisfy you, but perhaps it will fill some time in your day because obbviously you are petty and wouldn't know a real problem if it licked you in the face!" Chelle
Sorry for the spelling error on "obbviously." I obviously got too worked up! Ha! Chelle
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