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Thursday, February 22, 2007

It's been over a year since I left radio and every once in a while, someone asks me if I miss it. In fact, at the KR retreat, after I'd told some story of some kind, someone suggested I look into radio, because she thought I'd be really good on the air. It took me several minutes to stop laughing long enough to explain.

But do I miss it? Yes and no.

I miss Todd, and Jeff (incidentally, if anyone's reading this from Tampa FL, let me know and you might be able to hear my Jeff - he's working there now), and of course Sharon. I miss people coming up to me on the street after recognizing my laugh and telling me that something I said on the air really touched them. I miss the free concerts and dinners and events (and hairstyles and manicures) that I never would have been able to afford (cuz God knows radio doesn't pay well enough for frivolity like that!). I miss being on the air and being forced to be the best version of myself several hours a day.

I do not miss the being at work at four-thirty in the morning, staying until three in the afternoon, and then being expected to be at a smokey bar at seven that night; the pay, which after hours like that came to below minimum wage; the abuse; being told that even though I've gotten the highest ratings in the area and beaten our lead competitor for the first time since the station existed that I'm not getting a raise until I do a better job vacuuming when it's my turn even if that wasn't in my job contract; doing the weather; having to listen to a bus-full of middle schoolers call and request Britney Spears' Lucky every single day at 3:20pm and every three minutes for the next hour for three weeks straight; having to do commercials for companies I disagree with; dealing with clients who think thirty seconds and fifty seconds are close enough; being recognized at WalMart at three in the morning trying to buy cold medicine while looking not as attractive as death warmed over and being asked for an autograph; having to do remote broadcasts in the freezing cold outside and having to sound like I can't imagine any place I'd rather be than an auto part store; having one caller complain we play a song too much, and having the very next caller request that song; strip clubs; being told that women (by a woman manager) can't be on the air in the afternoon shift because it's too alienating to the drivers and I'll cause accidents.... the list goes on.

soooooo....

why am I rambling on about this?

Because I had a dream about radio last night.

I was on the air with an old ex-boyfriend who lost half a finger, and when he tried to count me down for my intro, I kept getting confused because I didn't know if he meant a whole second or half a second when he held up that finger. So when it was his time to get off the bench and go play football, it was a good thing and I took over the shift alone. So at first I was terrific and immediately began getting more women callers, which is a good thing. But then
(duh duh DUUUUMMMMM)
The computer broke down, and I had to start playing from CD... and with every CD, my caller in between songs was getting younger and younger, so that after I accidentally played the rap version of Dido in which she cusses (which, to my knowledge, doesn't exist, except in this particular dream) my next callers were elementary aged, and then all I could find were nursery rhymes on CD.

And then I woke up.

Because little is more terrifying in radio than your audience skewing too young.

*sigh*

7 Comments:

Anonymous Sarah said...

Did you take cold medicine before you went to sleep?

9:39 AM  
Blogger Javajem said...

So when I ask you to sing me your favorite Britney Spears song I can expect to hear Lucky!! :)

11:27 AM  
Anonymous sallyjo said...

Is there something going on with the dreams? I know you dream a lot, but I've been having wacky nightmares where something is just wrong! Why?

5:41 PM  
Blogger vi said...

take good care amie


maybe you need more sleep
and a stronger front door?

vi

9:12 PM  
Anonymous Jan B. said...

From what I'm hearing around my area, live radio jocks are becoming less common. Many of the shifts, esp. on the weekends, are filled with pre-recorded shows. I work for a large insurance company in IT, and one of our longest-term employees did on-air weekend shifts for many years. He now pre-records his at home and sends 'em in. No phones to answer. You can be "on the air" all night and still be fresh as a daisy the next morning! :-)

10:21 AM  
Blogger David said...

You know, if our nightmares have anything to say about it, our family is extremely creative.

Or neurotic. I'm not sure which.

11:48 AM  
Blogger Kadiddly said...

Someday I'll make it out East. It gets cold there, though. We'll go on a yarn crawl and you can show me how to spin on a wheel =)

5:39 PM  

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